Oct. 19, 1918
Will answer your letter received today. I am getting all the letters you write, only get them all in bunches. Got 4 today; one from Aunt Mandy Snyder, one from Mary McCoy, one from you and Allie, and one from a girl in Alabama. Way down in ole Alabam'! Oh, I got acquaintances all over now, ha! My little Alabama is one of these blue-eyed light complected auburn haired madamoiselles just Allie's size. She is a pretty girl and she is wise, too. He name is Thelma Wise. She sure can write some letters. If she is just as good and pretty as her letters, she is some bird. O, Henry!
Well, if you are able to do all you named, you must be pretty well and hearty. Say, don't you pay any attention to what I said about that insurance. I know you didn't want that thunder, but a joke is a joke, you know. I guess I didn't think of that like you would. You know a fellow gets so used to anything like that in the army and it doesn't get under his skin like it does you folks. I said all along that I was coming home just as good and clean, as far as my character was concerned, as I was when I left and I am. You shall be the judge and very soon, too. But there's things I will have to live down when I return, the same as I had to put down and keep down when I went to the army.
You know, in civil life, we think more of life and death and have a different love for one another than we have for our comrades in arms. But when a fellow is taken from civil life and put in the army, he is put there for a purpose and that purpose is worth more than life. So he has got to think about his duty and not the love of life and so on. He can't think of his folks like he could if he was with them or there would have to be some of our dads sent over to take us off of them guys! When we do give them enough, believe me, we'll all pack up and go over there and tear the whole country up, then stack it in main street Berlin and put all our powder and explosives under the pile and set sail for New York! Let 'er go, Bill, and all there'll be left of Germany will be a hole in the ground! We won't even leave a cabbage head or weiner in the whole place, eh! Well, we can do it if we want to. Germany can't stop us, ha! Ha!
Well, I don't think we need any of our 18 year old brothers to help us. I think we've about got his goat as it is, but let 'em come. We'll get enough over here soon to just eat the blame Germans alive. Good for Wardie! Am looking for that letter alright. Beckie, go to it, get supper and let Mother rest. Some of these times you're going to have two soldier boys to get supper for. maybe if Bill gets in. We'll spread it on thick, I allow.
Oh! "Choked Chicken" is all right for a school teacher. He knows enough, anyway. If it wasn't for that screech he has to make when he tries to see behind his ears! I never noticed it so much when I went to him. He wasn't so bad then, but I expect if I was in the room with him now when he had one of them things, I'd have to get my geography lesson "toots weet" (that's French for right quick).
Well, you had better go in the hog business right. Anybody that can sell 18 month old suckling razorbacks for the price you did, and then sell the mother of the bunch for that price, had ought to be in the business. You sure sold that hog if anybody ever did.
Well, I am always careful, you know. Well, I was reading your letter and walking along slow, trying to watch my step and several other things. All at once the first thing I knew I stepped on something and, rippetty splash! Down in the mud turning hand springs, summer salts and skinning the cat! You ought to see that letter, ha! You asked if I didn't think your paper was pretty. Well, its extra dark complected pretty now, ha! Of course, the whole Regiment was looking. I fought shy of the officer all evening for fear he'd think I'd got too much Vin Blanc. Ha! Ha! No, I didn't have this piece of paper along. It looks like it came from the trenches but am short on paper. Will get more soon. Well, write soon. Must close. As ever your son,